Mirror Mirror on the Wall: Women and Vanity

While Russ and I were loitering in SM North, I saw two advertisements of Snow White adaptations: one with Kristen Stuart and the other with Julia Roberts. These ads reminded me of the wicked stepmother's line 'Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?' I found it funny that coincidentally, the night before, I had seen an animation which tackles vanity in one of its episodes. I smirked as I came to a conclusion that I had been surrounded by a 'controversial' topic but I totally took it for granted: women's narcissism.

 

Women, more than any other species in this world, love to look at their reflection. Wherever we go, we always bring mirror with us. If in case we have forgotten to bring one, which I doubt any self-conscious woman will, we always go on field trips to nearby restrooms. If there are none, which is close to impossible of course, we always find ways to look at ourselves through mirror substitutes like windshields of cars, windows of houses and establishments, spoons, CDs, and lately, phones particularly the dual camera ones.

We check our hair, makeup, clothes, facial expressions, zits etcetera wherever we go whenever we want to. It would have been a normal thing had we, women, stayed that way. But no, we just have to check the reflection of those beside us and compare-you got that right-compare ourselves to them. We check their hair, makeup, clothes, and facial expressions. This habit either makes or breaks our day. If the other woman is prettier, sexier, cooler, then most probably we end up feeling so bad about ourselves. If she is not so pretty, we feel great and confident. Is it then hasty to conclude that mirrors spite envy?

I am not sure if this behavior is what old folks saw in women that they were able to create Snow White or the evil stepmother and pass the responsibility to the Brothers Grimm. If it is, then it is such a shame for us women to be compared to a witch. This makes to-be-like-Snow White even more appealing to us. However, the downside still is as we strive to look like her, we keep on being like the other woman instead. We just cannot stop comparing.

I recall what Sunako has said in Yamato Nadeshiko Shichi Henge (Wallflower), the animation that I watched last weekend, that if we could stop trying to be 'ladies' then we wouldn't have any problem. She shares that we only put unnecessary load on ourselves as we keep on comparing our very own miserable identities to 'dazzling creatures.' Therefore, she concludes, that we must destroy all the mirrors in our houses. She proceeds to annihilate all of the mirrors in the house and even trashes the vanity things including cosmetics and perfume.

Isn't it great?

Therefore we only have two ways to solve this prevalent issue. One is to break all of the mirrors at home if we can’t stop comparing ourselves to others. The other solution is stop comparing ourselves to others if we can’t live without our mirrors.

As for me, I will just see the Snow White adaptations and pity the evil Stepmother as much as I pity insecure yet ironically vain women. Then, I will watch Wallflower some more. I can use some optimism in this world.

Mada Mada Dane

It has been awhile since I have blogged about Prince of Tennis. I cannot even remember the last time I have written a fanfiction about the anime. I also do not watch anymore but there is one thing that makes me want to relive my PoT addiction: Ryoma Echizen's cap.

I am not a Ryoma-fan not because he is a complete jerk, as some profess. I do like the fact that he is a renowned tennis player already before he comes to Seigaku. This makes the anime quite unique from those that usually start with the protagonist being weak and getting stronger as the stories progress. I am not his fan because...because there are more characters with extraordinary characteristics. They also deserve to be noticed. Among them are Fuji, Eiji, Niou, Shiraishi, and Oshitari.

Last Monday, two of my Criminology students, Joe Alison Allacon and Regor dela Cruz, gave me a cap as a belated New Year's gift. At first I could not recognize the cap, given the span of time since I have last seen Prince of Tennis. After few minutes, it finally sank in. It was Ryoma Echizen's cap, white one with the red R in the blue box. I wondered how come they knew I liked PoT and they said they saw my netbook's wallpaper last semester. Back then it was a photo of the chibi Seigaku characters. I just couldn't believe they could still remember it.

Having students who remember what a teacher does in class, what she likes, and what she hates and follow these things not because they are forced but they chose to remember is indeed heartwarming. Receiving the cap is not a big deal. It may be cliché but "it is the thought that counts." I can buy caps anytime I want but I won't receive such gifts from my students everyday.

I have this feeling that I need to rewatch Prince of Tennis once again. This time , with the cap on. I will probably like Ryoma more. Hehe.

"Mada mada..."

cosplay

cheska-san and I never talked about the outfits that we would wear this friday. It was mere coincidence or let's charge it to our almost similar wave length that we had the same theme. Yup: Anime style. 

It's not entirely cosplay since I did not have any anime character I could base my outfit on. Aside from that I want to just look the part without overdoing it. I haven't seen the day that i will wear a wig outside.

it's nice to deviate from my usual style from time to time. It breaks the ice around me. i want to catch people off guard and i can say i did it again. 

unburied

A picture does paint a thousand words that I can’t bear looking at your happy ones…they shout at me that whilst I drown myself in my insufferable bitterness, you are there contented and satisfied. I have already thrown your pictures away. However, I still have one left-the one where you are neither happy, nor sad…your ID picture. It’s the only picture of thousands of words that I can interpret in thousands of meanings.

15042011 my top ear candies

After months of hiatus, I am back.




1. Shining- Yuki Shirai
2. Departures- Aozu and Cap to Bin
3. Iroasenai ano sora e- Stones
4. Fly High, Sky High
5. Driving Myself- Hiro X
6. Can't Keep On Loving You- Eliot Yamin
7. Gather- Ao To Bin To Kan
8. Hands Up- Bigbang
9. I believe- Fantasia
10. Don't Go Home, Baby- Gdragon and Top


The list will make sense to those who are into anime particularly Prince of Tennis. There are some English songs here and there and well, my playlist won't be complete without Bigbang.

15042011 my top ear candies

After months of hiatus, I am back.




1. Shining- Yuki Shirai
2. Departures- Aozu and Cap to Bin
3. Iroasenai ano sora e- Stones
4. Fly High, Sky High
5. Driving Myself- Hiro X
6. Can't Keep On Loving You- Eliot Yamin
7. Gather- Ao To Bin To Kan
8. Hands Up- Bigbang
9. I believe- Fantasia
10. Don't Go Home, Baby- Gdragon and Top


The list will make sense to those who are into anime particularly Prince of Tennis. There are some English songs here and there and well, my playlist won't be complete without Bigbang.

gotta catch 'em all

At this very moment, I am not really sure what to think. All I have in mind is I have to post something for my blog because it has been ages since I have last posted something substantial.

Shall I tell you about Pokemon?

Right. That’s all I can think of anyway. It’s my brother’s fault. You see, he downloaded a GBA application which enables people to play Gameboy games using PCs. I thought it was about time that I got to play a different game since I already conquered Zuma several months ago and the swirling colorful balls don’t interest me anymore.

Together with the application are the games themselves and some of them are Pokemon games. I could not believe my eyes at first and before I knew it, I was hooked. I am playing Pokemon Fire Red version by the way. It is my second time playing it through my PC. My first game has been corrupted by my own stupid fingers (I have saved a new game to my old game, huhu…). I think I am spending at least one hour a day playing it, forsaking my blogs, my stories, my laundry, myself. Can you blame me? I have been in love with Pikachu for as long as I can remember.

Currently, I have already succeeded in the Pokemon League (for those who have played this, you know what I am saying). I am being too careful in saving the game otherwise the same file corruption will happen. Also, I am so careful in battling now, aiming for my Pocketmonsters to reach higher levels. To give you an idea, my Charmander (Eiji) is level 73, Zapdos(Syuusuke) is 53, Articuno(Masaharu) is 51, Pikachu (Fuji) 51, Gyarados (Yuuta) 43, and Gloom (Ibu) 41.And yes, you are reading it correctly. I have named them after Prince of Tennis characters.

The big problem is the version I have is not complete and it ends after the player has beaten Gary Oak. This is upsetting for me since I have been expecting more. Blame the reviews and guides I have seen in the internet.

I think I will try the other versions even if I am not familiar with the new generation of Pokemons (how can Japan produce so many?).

That’s just it. You have wasted your time reading an incoherent journal about Pokemons. Hehe.

nihonggo notes and osaka pen

While cleaning up, I saw some of my old notes including the one I used for my nihonggo self-study years ago, and a pen from Osaka University.

Going back to the Japanese study?

Nope, just getting back to anime addiction.

Aside from that, who needs self study when she has a friend who will soon translate the animations they watch together.

Hehe, gambatte  Maiden-sama/ yeobo/ Eejeong/ Ryoma…

…Is it gaMbatte or gaNbatte?

decisions: result

I wrote about my life changing decision here. It has been a year. I am still sitting in the same place, using the same computer. Nothing has changed except maybe for my haircut…and well, my clothes. However, mentally and socially, I think I have grown.

I have learned a different language. I can read and write Hangul now, can understand Korean dramas and correct some hastily made subs. In return, I have acquired a good amount of different culture and included it my daily life.

I have learned to criticize pieces of literature and art (mada mada dane: I still need to study though). I have read a good number of books, blogs, mangas, and yes, fanfictions. All these contribute to more writing styles for my part. I have learned to write more important things (yes, fanfiction IS important) than plain rants in my blog.

I have learned to criticize people under their very noses and get away unscathed. However, I also know now how to deal with different people.

I have learned how to be a better hypocrite. When before, I used to just be silent when I did not like something or somebody, right now, I can smile without giving any clue to what I really feel. How do I know this? Because people still keep coming, even if I don’t like some of them to. I have learned to adjust to what part of me they want to see, what reactions they want from me. I feel honored whenever my real friends point this out to me. At least, I still have that part of me that is human.

As I continue having a mask on, I have learned to be genuine. I have learned to show how happy, angry, and sad I am to people I choose. I speak openly when I am depressed. I clown around when I am happy. I destroy things, or mutter curses in the dark when I am angry.

I have learned to make, value, and keep not good, but great friends.

I have maintained a harmonious relationship with my family despite the randomness of my decisions.

You see, I have grown so much. I can’t say I regret making that decision a year ago. Far from it.

I am not disappointed… But I am also not satisfied…Those conditions are part of my standards of living after all.

For the meantime, I can say I am happy… I know however, that I can be happier.

This is the time that I know that I will make another decision.

lying and I

Niou Masaharu

I am not going to proclaim that I am a Holden Caulfield, the biggest liar that I can ever meet . The mere idea is too pretentious to me. I will be satisfied by labeling myself as Niou, the trickster. 


There is more to him in me than Kikumaru Eiji and Fuji Syuusuke put together, I have just figured out. The ability to mask who we really are is but a flick of our fingers.

Being the best, he can immediately sense sugarcoated sins, bedazzling bluffs and incoherent inconsistencies. Having these capabilities, he forms a different picture of who he wants people to see him as. He does not point out their stupidity. It gives him excitement seeing them make a fool of themselves trying to make him believe. How he savors the look on their faces when they think they have convinced him! What is more is he relishes the idea that people will soon entangle themselves to their self-images like the puppets he often uses. And he, Niou Masaharu, will be patiently waiting at the finish line to cut the strings and crush them.

 It's a part of the fic I have written about him that you can find in: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6754601/1/

the time when i pushed the vlc screen capture

I have contemplated long and hard whether I should post this or not. as you can see, I am not just a regular nobody as I proclaim that I am.  I do believe that there are eyes looking at me, their traps wide open-ready to judge, waiting for me to fall.


However, I've already gone beyond that. It's been ages since I've learned that my life is not dictated by what people want me to be nor who they see me as. After all, I am what I want them to see soooooo...

my favorite pair

the tensai

Fuji Syuusuke, serious mode ON

love triangle?

yes, it's a love triangle

the perfect pair

hehe

You might be asking, "why the long introduction..."

I am just aware and maybe afraid that people may find me immature...but i guess that's pretty much what I am...haha

my family is addicted to PoT

PoT as in Prince of Tennis.

Addiction to anime really runs in the family (should I count my mom out? lately, she knows pot characters and cleverly distinguishes one from another). my father used to buy cds after cds of animations and all of us would enjoy a bowl of junk food and watch the animations together (then my mom would be the first to doze). 

this is my current cp wallpaper

come to think of it, it's been awhile since my father has bought a cd, nor seen animations on tv. One of the causes i think is the dvd player is not at all working. Other reason is he is too busy with work. Now, he is having his one week of break from work (he has colds) and enjoying episodes of animations stored in my notebook.It was a good timing that I have copies of Prince of Tennis from manga to anime to film to musicals (i even have copies of OSTs. thanks to Ryoma/ Karupin, Atobe/Tezuka, and Nanjiro for keeping the addiction alive. hehe). My father is a fan of Slamdunk and since both animations have sports as theme, he is easily hooked by PoT.


I hardly touch my PC and there he goes asking me if he can see the animation (as if i have the power to deny him). We have different schedules at home, you see. my father, being a call-center agent is awake at wee hours of the morning so he is my competitor in pc usage. My brothers give me their puppy-dog eyes requesting me to lend the PC so they can see the same anime (XERD, the youngest being a student only has weekends; SKWAPUT, the younger only goes  home once in a while). My mom, well she doesn't use it for animations but for games. However, since my father is staying at home  this week, she has no option but let him have her "share." And she i think is quite entertained by animated young boys that look too old for their ages who can swing rackets like pros.


Now, whenever my friends ask me "What episode was it when blah blah blah?" I promptly give an answer worthy of a Guiness Record for memorizing episode number plus title. They can't put the blame on me since technically I am not the one who voluntarily keeps rewatching episodes. 

can you see stars in broad daylight?

I haven’t considered somebody to be my best friend, at least seriously. Friends come from different times in unexpected places so I haven’t given much thought about it.

But these people saw me at my worst (in my twenty years of existence). 

One of them has her own business already

from grace ann's phone

Another is in pursuit of her own dreams: to become a lawyer.

from grace ann's phone

And I? I’m still a free lancer as always.

Well, we’ve been following different paths since we’ve known each other.  

Instead of breaking us apart, these paths remind us that when we feel discouraged, we just have to turn around and see each other working our way to the top and we’ll be motivated to pursue our dreams.

resurfacing

I’m back from the grave. I’ve been so engrossed in reading mangas and watching animes lately (finished Rekka no Hounou manga last Sunday. My heart broke. Finished Shaman King animation this Monday, my heart broke again… wah…am reading Nodame Cantabile –which I have first seen as Japanese Drama. Good Lord, when am I going to finish reading the novels I have lined up for this month?).

In addition to that, I’ve been so busy updating my fiction that I don’t really have time to post things in my blog aside from hurried rants).

To make up for my absence, I’ll share something significant to you guys.

I registered in NaNoWriMo last month to motivate myself to continue working on a “novel” that has been in my head since when I was in high school. However, I think I wasn’t motivated enough. For the record, I haven’t submitted anything to the word counter. The digits in my account are still rigid six zeroes.

I won’t say that the registration did not help me in my writing adventures. I have been so busy entertaining myself with childish things (remembering a part of a quote that runs along this line: The time that we start growing old is the time we stop playing). I receive help from time to time (since registering in NaNoWriMo means getting newsletters called “Pep Talk”). Some renowned writers give pointers on how participants can get through the 50,000-word requirement. Most of the tips are the usual ones, but, according to Holly Black (The Spiderwick Chronicles), there’s nothing wrong in being reminded.

I’ll be posting the gist of some of the tips that I am receiving. I have to make it clear, however, that I’m merely posting them to share what I find substantial (I’m a teacher by license after all) and not to gain credit from the authors’ thoughts.

I guess, with all that said, I’ll be able to get back in track in blogging. Hehe.

getting hooked again

Am getting back to an old hobby—writing fanfictions of my favorite anime.

I thought and still think it is the easiest thing to do. Characters and settings are already supplied. The fanfic writer only needs to supply the “flashback” and “side-stories” of the animation. I used to draft my stories in my notebook or any piece of paper I could get hold of. I remember writing one beside my school notes when I found the class boring (people had the impression that I was studious. Nope. I just wrote things to wake myself-up)

Truth be told, I almost forgot that I even had made some. These past few days, my mind was fogged up with the idea that I was old enough to start taking life seriously and be in love with real human beings and not with some products of someone else’s imagination.

Then again, I was wrong. Good thing, a friend reminded me of the so-called fanfiction.net and I’m back to writing fics. Just recently, I have updated one that I drafted four years back. It feels like having a reunion with a very important high-school classmate.

Hope I still have enough creative juices though. I’m afraid I’m starting to go deeper into the rabbit’s fur. I want to see the magician’s eyes once again.

seeing slamdunk and falling out of love

Back when I was in high school, I used to get addicted to the anime Slam Dunk. I used the internet to search for “facts” about the anime. I found much later that I was hooked to the fanfictions written about Sam Dunk as well. To think, I even followed sites for forum to check whether Rukawa is gay or not.

I remember one time, my seatmate/neighbor/music video partner/chatmate/comrade Ryia and I cut classes to watch Slam Dunk in her house. The episode was about Megane-kun/kogure. We also made “scrapbooks” and traded cards and stickers.

In my case, the manic disease got worse. For several times, I attempted to create a fanfiction featuring Akira Sendoh. Such futile attempts—up until now, I still plan to continue with it but I lost the creative juices and the time long ago. I only ended up having a character sketch. I even decided to trash the whole idea. I only have the plot with me now.

But that doesn’t mean I don’t love Slam Dunk anymore. I still watch its Tagalized version in GMA7 even though we already have the dvd version of it. Hihi. I still have akira sendoh as my standard of a good guy. I don’t know where that actually came from. From time to time I think of the would-be fanfiction for it.

Probably the addiction gradually wears off once maturity sets in. Since I’m an immature person, a part of me still clings to the anime world and the other half is already in what Holden calls a phony world. Phony but more realistic.

anime and all that jahz

..i can't remember the first time i've not been attached to animes. up until now, i've been trying to come-up with good fan-fictions to share the world. i've ony successfully come up with one. thank you...i will try some time next year publishing more fictions. God knows how itchy my hands are in writing my beloved pieces.

..who knows..maybe i could have my own work place next year.oh dear, just have to wait until my father settles the house....grr...